Let's get real.
Okay? Now, I know you're doing this because I catch myself doing it too. So, saying shit like, I'm too busy, or I don't have time, or maybe people start not reaching out to you anymore because they don't want to bother you because they know that you're too busy, they're not inviting you to do things, they just assume that you're, have a crazy schedule, and they don't want to bother you, they don't want to be another thing you have to look at, another notification on your phone.
And maybe you've lost touch with friends. Maybe you feel like you're losing yourself in the storm of trying to scale your business and to make something of yourself so that it's so much to the point where you forgot what it's like to just hang out, to just sit with a friend and not think about work, to just do a craft for the sake of doing it, not because you have to create something to make money from it.
Maybe you feel ashamed because you do love what you do so much that you think about it all the time. Like you're just fucking obsessed. I mean, it's okay to be obsessed. It's okay to love something that much. But maybe you just don't know how to balance that drive and that determination with allowing yourself the time to decompress and exist outside of the energy of constant creation and client chasing.
Having to create for a purpose. Like, it can be so exhausting, can't it? Like, we end up taking what we love and turning it into so much more work that you kind of start to get resentful. Does it feel like if you don't show up today, you're going to lose out on something? Like, it's going to cost you if you don't respond?
Are you going to lose that sale? Are you going to lose that client? Are you going to lose that booking? Let's burn down this bullshit because, my sweet, dear, beautiful soul, you have to live your life too. You do.
Hello, my mystic sistars, my fellow creative and multi passionate souls. It's your host here, Jessica Mystic, with your favorite starseed, soul sistar, cheerleader vibe. And we're gonna love you as you are, as you are amongst all this. Even though you keep telling yourself all this crazy shit and showing up and overdoing it, we're gonna peel it back and show you what's truly possible.
And this is a show Or I'm going to teach you how to make the most of your life and business through mindful magic and developing cash habits that help you manifest more money. As you begin to burn down this bullshit and curate that chaos in order to save your sanity and create the life that you truly deserve.
Now let's dive into the root of your TMTD disease like the too much to do disease. It's it's a problem So let's just dive into this the stress and dread that you feel Believing that you just have too much to do and that you're never you've never have enough time to do it it's causing you to just Feel so lost and behind and just this, this existential dread of like, what am I going to do with myself?
Like, how am I going to get through life? Like, this is what it is. Like, it's just the constant hustle and grind. Well, first of all, life's always going to be throwing something your way. So you need to just accept that business or no business. Let's address the resentment and the guilt you're feeling though because that is where your resistance and resentment is stemming from.
When you feel you've got too much to do and you've got kind of like that, um, um, um, kind of like that chip on your shoulder and you're feeling like you're just dragging your feet through it, you're forcing yourself to show up. Well, it's because you're overdoing it. When you're getting angry, especially if you're a manifester, I'm a manifester.
So I like go in cycles and I go, I go, go, go. But when I get ragey or frustrated and I think it's because something's not working. So I want you to really assess again, your energetic assessment, where, where are your emotions at right now? Because they're telling you something. If you have resentment, And you're feeling guilty for resenting the thing that you wanted to do when you got into this business in the first place, when you feel like, Oh my God, I've created so much work for myself.
You know, you grow boss too hard that you have to actually run your fucking business. It doesn't mean that it needs to be a gong show. It doesn't mean that you need to burn yourself out and be running around like crazy, 24 seven, burning the wick at both ends. No, no, no, my friend, you are the boss. You are the boss in your business.
You get to schedule. Your time and energy in a way that works for you and makes you money. The reason you're overdoing it is because you have an underlying fear of failure. This incessant need to prove yourself to seek validation through achievement to prove that your time and energy and money borrowed to create your business wasn't wasted.
So you're rooted in like this, this vein, like this vein idea of I need to prove myself. I need to, I need to make something of myself. Like that's a lot of pressure and that pressure is what breeds your resentment. And then that guilt for feeling resentment towards your business and that guilt for building a business instead of taking care of your babies or paying more attention to your husband, or you're guilty for spending your mom's money and you haven't made it back yet.
And. This is where the resistance stems from. You need to address those underlying emotional issues, which all come back to fear. It's the fear of failure. Because if you fail, if you don't make something of yourself, if you don't put this money to use, if you don't make it back. You've taken something from someone.
You've made a fool of yourself. You're afraid to fail. But the thing is in business, it's a constant learning process. And as long as you don't give up, you will never fail. There's no such thing as failure, if you don't fucking give up. If you keep going, those failures are simply lessons learned along the way.
One of my mentors once said, Adam Chatterley, with Beauty Business Secrets, he once said, you're either going to get the result you wanted, or the lesson you needed. And that is never right. More true. I remind myself that daily, daily. Now this fear of failure and this, this want to, to overperform, the constant overachieving underlying overachiever, that high, high achiever, that, that exists within you, , that need to unlock next level success all the time.
Usually this stems from your childhood and these stories that you tell yourself or have been bestowed upon you because the stories that we tell ourselves like their foundational pieces in our upbringing. Usually, if you're, if the masculine energy in your home so for example for me, my father was in the military so my father was away he was overseas or he was on exercise, and my father wasn't around.
Not that he didn't want to be, but for his work, he couldn't be. He was told where to be and what to do. So not having my father around and then my mom having to work full time. And then my brother is on the spectrum and. He's very high functioning. He does very well, but in school, it was very difficult.
People didn't understand him and I had to have more of a parenting role and take care of my brother while my mom was at work or he would be suspended from school for behavior and I would have to take care of my brother at home and I would have to miss school and I was forced to grow up too quickly.
And when we are forced to grow up too quickly or to operate or make up for energy that's missing in the home or to be the emotional support. My mom never demanded it of me but it was always there. She struggled. My mother struggled with alcoholism and she was a great mother. Like I didn't even know she suffered from alcoholism because she didn't drink until we went to bed and she's been sober for over 20 years now by the way.
Shout out to my mom. But there's a lot of You know, like, her suffering through trying to raise us and dealing with my brother, and like, we had school shut down, teacher's licenses revoked for the ways he was treated, trying to get him the help that he needed to understand him, to know what's going on, people kept saying he was deaf, dumb, and stupid, so fighting for my brother, and then my dad not knowing what's happening, not knowing what's going on, and then feeling a tension between them, which inevitably led to their divorce, It all has this story where it's like, well, I have to show up because my family needs me.
They need me, whether I want to do it or not. We have to, we just have to do it. Like my mom was forced to go to push through all of these challenges because my dad wasn't there because the army said he couldn't be. And that kind of ended up being a story where it's like, no one's going to help us. We got to just take care of ourselves.
And this is also a story that stemmed back in my mother's childhood. Like she was left to fend for herself. So that fend for herself went through her childhood, came into her adulthood, kind of came off on us. And we were all always the new kids, always in a new place, always fending for ourselves. Like we didn't have.
a support system to fall back on. So that carried through into adulthood, which carries into this work ethic, this need to, to prove myself like we're rated on performance. And that's, that's not just for military families, but like performance. You look at athletes, you look at the school system, the grading system, you know, that contribute.
I didn't even know I had anxiety until after school because I was a straight A student, but there was so much pressure there. I had to be a straight A student. I had to prove myself. We're always being ranked on performance rather than appreciated for where we're at and who we are. So that story is what leads in us to becoming these productivity machines as we grow up.
Right? So we're always in such a hurry. We're in a hurry to grow up. We're in a hurry to finish school. We're in a hurry to get to work. We're in a hurry to get the tasks that are put on us done in a day.
We're always, , we're always in a rush to be on time. To be somewhere for something. Can't be late. Can't be late. It's ingrained in us to perform, to grow, to finish first, to check everything off the list. Look at today and look at the expectations.
Like look at today and the expectations that are placed upon us to be. Instantly accessible and available. Look at how,
the more I think about it, I think of like how our children don't have to sit through commercials. They have access to movies all the time. They don't have to pick a movie and fight with the VHS. They don't have to. Wait for Sunday Disney movie nights and then sit through commercials where a 20 minute show takes over an hour.
So look at today and the expectations placed upon us to constantly be available, to instantly respond. We have multiple inboxes, direct messages. People don't really phone you anymore. No one leaves, like, uh, uh, remember answering machines where you had to like Everyone made the cool intro, you had to wait for it to finish, people play like a whole song, make sound like party, then you have to leave the message, but no one would get back to you until they got back home and actually checked the answering machine and then made the effort to phone you back, but now it's all instant.
It's all instant, we all expected instant response. And our children are being raised the same way. They don't have to wait for Sunday night Disney movie night and then sit through commercials in order to watch the show. I remember commercials like, okay, go brush your teeth. Like, those were the breaks. A 20 minute show like The Grinch, think of like Christmas that just passed.
The Grinch is only like a 20 minute, the classic Grinch is like a 20 minute cartoon. And I thought it was like a movie because it would take over an hour to watch the damn thing because there were always commercials in between. Like we were just taught to wait in order to get what we want. And to like push through so to push through commercials and push through this and now everything's instant if something doesn't load right away we just go to the next thing you know people being exposed on their net even for sales they used to be like you had to expose someone seven times or maybe even nine times.
And then it was told, Oh, I have to be exposed to 12, 12 times before they'll say yes to a sale. Well, that's over 20 now, like it takes over 21 times for someone to be exposed to something before they'll actually say yes, because we're so inundated with shit all the time. And everything needs to be instant or right now, like we can't even, you know, typing in a pin for our debit or credit card was too much.
Now we have tap. Right? Like, look at Netflix. Movies on demand, streaming all the time. You can binge a show if you want. You don't have to wait till next week. You know how painful it is? I'm actually guilty of that. I don't like waiting every week. I don't like waiting every week to watch my show. I would rather wait till it comes on Netflix so I can sit and binge it, right?
Like we don't have to wait for dial up to get on the internet and then I remember dreading if we're on the internet and someone phoned because you know seconds save lives my dad's in the army so if someone phoned especially when he worked range control so if someone phoned like we had to get off the internet right away because you couldn't have the phone and the internet running at the same time yes i'm dating myself and that's fine so someone would phone it would show up oh shit so we had to get off we would just get connected you'd have to wait to dial back up you It's not like that anymore.
It's instant access. If we don't have instant WiFi, we get ragey. We get ragey because nothing works without it. Everything is direct access and instant response, and that's the expectation that's being set. So without dial up, without answering machines, without suffering through skipping discmans and tuning into radio stations and VCRs that just have fuzzy screens, we are being taught and trained that if it's not happening right now, it's not working.
But that's not true in business or in life because shit takes fucking time. Now how much time it's going to take is up to you. If you're taking, taking consistent action and you're getting help and guidance from those who have done the trial and error, you can save yourself a lot of time, but you still have to put skin in the game.
You don't need to burn yourself out doing it. You don't need to hustle and grind. There's a little hustle from time to time, but it gets to be fun and you get to choose when you want to put the hustle in because sometimes it feels good. Feels good to do a little extra, you know, just like when you're watching sports and people kind of, they get the hustle in, but the game is only for so long and they have breaks.
They take breaks, right? They have intermissions when you watch a concert or a show for dancers. Like there's, there's a time to show up and shine, and then there's a time to rest and restore, you know, becoming a mother. really made me show up in a way, at first I kind of resented it, to be honest. I struggled with a lot of guilt and grievance of the life I had before because I was already exhausted with the expectations and my obsession with my work and the demands I placed upon myself, that the idea of having to now care for another human being and raise them on top of everything I was already doing was impossible.
It felt impossible because it was impossible. There is no fucking way I could function in the capacity I was before children and be a mother. I would die. I would go to my shop. My tattoo shop, I would go to work, I would work all day, and then I would draw until like 2 or 4 in the morning, prepping all my shit, and answering emails, and doing all the things, and then I would go to sleep for a few hours, and I would do the whole thing again every day, now how was I going to do that, raise a little human, take care of myself as a mother, I couldn't, it fucking broke me, but in the best way, because then I started to realize what was actually important, see my daughter was 7 weeks old when I went back to work, and it really upsets me, because I missed out a lot,
I was so worried. about losing my shop and upsetting people or letting them down. Like, I remember going to work so engorged. My breasts hurt so much. I overproduced milk, a lot of milk. Like, I remember having letdowns. I would just be soaking in my shirt. I hated it. I would go stand in the bathroom and they would just, my tits would just spray into the toilet.
Drain them and then back to work and then I would get home and I would nurse her, but I just had like this resentment and it wasn't towards my baby, but it's just like, why did I, why did I do this to myself? Like, I'm so miserable. How can I be any good of a mother if I'm just, this is what life is and then I would care for her during the day.
My husband would come home. We'd have 15 minutes. If he's lucky, he could have a shower. And then I was out the door. I didn't get to see him. We didn't get to support each other and it nearly broke us. All because I wanted to keep my shop afloat. I didn't want to let anyone down, I didn't want to, you know, leave anyone hanging, have unfinished work out there.
I decided to close my shop. I felt like I failed. I decided to close my shop because I needed to be more present as a mom, but that didn't stop the hustle. Because I couldn't stop creating. And I felt like something was wrong with me, because my husband would say, he's like, Why can't, why can't you just, you can't do it, can you?
He didn't say, why can't you? Because that's what I say to myself. He's like, you just can't do it. You just can't not be creating. It's just part of who you are. So I would create flash and I would sell into the future for when I could go to work. And I tried to work part time and work out of different shops, bounced around a little bit.
I would make, I made pots when I got pregnant with my son, I would make pots like. Cricket vinyls on pots, and I was hustling selling pots on the side. I did anything that I could to create to make money and come from a space. If I needed an outlet, I needed an outlet that was something other than motherhood.
And I still struggle with that. I still feel guilty. Like, why wasn't being a mother enough for me? Why couldn't I just be a stay at home mom? Because I need to create. I need. There's more. There's a higher purpose that I need to serve and when I don't show up in that way it doesn't work for me and there was a lot of healing and inward looking to understand where this was coming from and a lot of forgiveness and I hated myself for the way that I was and I hated myself for missing out on time with my daughter.
You know, but they, they cut that out of me because when I found out I had cancerous appendix and it had been living in me for 15 years, those 15 years were the 15 years that I was fighting to be a tattoo artist and make a name for myself. And it was a lot of reflection. It showed me what really mattered and what really mattered was making memories.
Living.
The expectations I was placing on myself were for what? Because I thought that that's what it took for me to get somewhere, to make something of myself. But really, I get to decide who I am and what I want to do with my life. I'm the one that determines my own value and worth in this world. No one else.
So how are you doing this? Are you feeding what's working for you? Are you too busy thinking of what you haven't done yet? Because the real question here is when you are going down this like, disappointment and despair and just, you're just pissed off with yourself for not being where you want to be yet or not showing up in a certain way or not doing things right.
And what you haven't done, if you're always looking at what you haven't done, then I really ask you to start celebrating. What have you done? What little things have you achieved? Because when you're in it, it's hard to see how far you've come and it's hard to appreciate where you are when you're so worried about where you're trying to go.
So my fellow list makers, I want you to start here. Your activity for this week is going to be this. I want you to list your goals. You're going to list 10 goals, whether they're for next week, end of the year, five years, I don't care. But list 10 goals, write them in past tense as if they've already happened.
That's the key because you want to lean into that energy and anchor into the power of This is happening for you. You're channeling that version of yourself, where this shit's already gone down. Like, you've done it. You've achieved it. We're celebrating what you've done. I used to do this. I would list 10 things daily.
I am a paramedical tattoo artist. I have my own studio. I have certifications in the following. I have a line of credit for this much. I've paid off my credit cards. Like the things that you're, the goals that you're making, I'm just spitting shit out here. These are things that I did say in the past. I am a public speaker.
I have four booked events a year. I wrote down I'm going to Italy and now that's happened. I've been invited to attend biotech conference. In Italy in May, so that's happening. I want you to write them down as if they've already happened because they are happening for you. You are here listening to this because you are dedicated to the dream.
You're devoted to showing up for yourself and making this happen because this is your calling. This is your purpose. This is why you are the way that you are.
So, write your list of goals. That have happened for you and anchor into how that feels as you write each one, I want you to channel how that feels because that feeling that you're unlocking, that's what the universe is channeling, not the rush, or the, the sense of like it hasn't happened yet and the frustration.
We don't want to call more of that and we don't want more blocks. We wanted to call in how it feels to have that checked off your list. And then I want you to write a list at the end of your day, really quick, at dinnertime, bedtime, just a quick reflection on what did you accomplish today? Don't look at what you didn't get done, what did you accomplish today?
Did you accomplish your top three tasks? And if you didn't, what did you do? Did you have an aha moment? What were your favourite things about today? I
want you to write those down, what you think on that. Better yet, celebrate your wins publicly. on a weekly basis, like a win wednesday or a fuck yeah friday, whatever you want to do, but i want you to celebrate your wins, something that you accomplished and are proud of this week, no matter how big, how small it could be, putting your laundry away, it's a big fucking win for me, it's what i did yesterday, i put all the laundry doom piles away in my bedroom, that's a big fucking win, it could be something really big like you hit your first 5k goal, your first 10k goal, you hit 6 figures, i want you to celebrate your wins and share Share in your stories.
Tag me in your wins. I want to celebrate alongside you. I am here. I am your fucking ultimate cheerleader. Even if you aren't working with me directly right now, you are still in this sorority. I want to celebrate you. So share in your stories or tag me in your post at Jessica Mystic. Invite others to be a part of your journey, because by showing and sharing, you're establishing your authority, and it shows your dedication to the dream.
It shows how you show up and lead yourself through the hard times, through the vision, and it shows that you're human. It shows that you're on a learning path. You're not an instant success influencer, because that shit isn't real.
But don't get lost and thinking that you have to prove yourself. This is just for you to actually anchor into the energy of celebration. You are more than a list of accomplishments. If anything from this activation today, I want you to take that away with you. You are more than a list of accomplishments.
I know how hard it is to believe that, that there's more to it than checking shit off the list. I know how hard it is when you're stuck in the, I have to prove myself mode, but you are worthy even when you're not at work. You don't need your clients or your family to tell you you're doing well and you're doing a good job.
You know if you're doing well. So what you did today, did you show up as your best self? You can be honest. Was that your best work? Did you rush through it? If so, don't beat yourself up over it. Put your hand on your heart and give yourself a little grace and say, I really like how I showed up. I'm going to do better tomorrow, but you need to be mindful and acknowledge and be honest with where you're at.
You have to accept where you're at now and love yourself through it and love yourself enough to enjoy the journey towards who you are becoming and the life that you're creating, the impact that your business, the impact you're having and why you're here, why you're doing this business and why you're sharing it with the world.
So let's dive into the crystal activation for today, which we're actually working with watermelon tourmaline because it's funny because I was working with my little piece of watermelon tourmaline this morning. It's the first one I grabbed off my dresser. And when I came to record this episode today, I was I like to intuitively do these activations as they come to me that day.
I don't like to pre plan my activations because if I pre plan the activation, it doesn't feel sincere. So as I'm talking about these topics, I'm like, okay, I anchor into the energy of where I'm at, where we're going. What do you need? I want the universe to tell me and feed me like a vessel. The information that I'm to pass on to you to help you become your best, to help you manifest more magic in your life, more mindfulness, more money, more awareness, more abundance, more impact.
I want you to lessen the noise and turn up everything that you deserve. I'm so tired of everyone burning themselves out for what? For this like false sense of security and being recognized by another for someone to pat you on the back and tell you you're worth a raise, that you're worth a promotion, like, make your own fucking way.
I want everyone to be free, to be themselves as they are, to do what they love. To light up the world with the light that's with that's within them. To pass on their gifts and their knowledge and their knowing so we can just co create this most magical fucking existence. Like, what is the point of living if we're not living our purpose?
If we're not feeling ourselves? If we're not present? What's the point of being here if we're not fucking present? If there's no joy, why are we doing anything?
I want you to anchor into bliss. absolute 100 percent bliss. And that's why we're working with watermelon tourmaline today. So I was holding this piece and I was thinking of how incredible it is. That I get to be home with my kids for two weeks, it can be hard being a mom and having those moments where like, I just need a minute to myself, but I'm also going to miss those moments when they're gone because they're going to grow up and they're not even going to want me to hang out with them for a while.
I'm sure I'll be that mom that probably embarrasses them with her will who knows. I want you to anchor into bliss and it's funny because I grabbed this stone I was working with it this morning. And then when I came down, and I was in my office and I was like okay. I wanted to pull a card for the day, and the card I pulled for the day, if you're watching on YouTube, you'll see me holding my stone right now, and the card that I pulled today, and it was f ing watermelon tourmaline, so I'm like, okay, today is a vibe!
And it's also pink and green, which is super aligned with who I am, and I was doing my Healy, and I was channeling being, so it's just, all these things are coming together today, it's just like a big, giant f ing yes from the universe.
So let's anchor into watermelon tourmaline. I'm going to anchor into the perfection of this moment,
as it is. As you are, right now, feel it.
Breathing into your heart, into your chest, with each breath, that ball in your chest is burning brighter, like a care bear stare. Channel something that creates real bliss. Think of the way, the way it felt when someone opened a gift this past holiday from you, how good it feels to give it to them, and the bliss it brings you, to have a hug from a loved one you haven't seen in a long time.
Whatever that bliss is, that joy, if it's a number in your bank account, no shame, don't care what it is, anchor into that bliss, forget the small stuff,
present, be where you are right now, this is where you need to be, there are lessons to be learned here, don't worry about where you're not gone yet, don't define your experience, live. This life, for yourself, as you are right now, in this very moment,
channel joy, optimism, enthusiasm, bring that, that is what you're calling into you right now. You are a powerful creator. Your multi passionate mind is capable of so many things. You are a powerful healer.
Whether you're in permanent makeup, the beauty industry, any act of service, even as a coach, as a motivator, as a mother, as a lover, as a daughter, as a sister, as a brother, it doesn't matter. You are a powerful healer. You are listening to this because you have a calling. Us healers have a hard time connecting because we're used to giving so much to everyone and feeling so empty because we don't know how to manage ourselves and our boundaries and we're so worried about what we're not doing or if we're not doing enough that when you anchor into the bliss in this moment you recognize that you're so heart led because you are a powerful healer.
What you do for others in this world and in this life and in your purpose, your creativity is your power. You heal through creation. You are a powerful creator. You are co creating with the universe. Feel the bliss in that. How fucking blessed are you to be co creating in this existence? So many other incredible humans in this world.
Changing the way people feel about themselves and their life experiences.
Your work is healing others. Don't get so distracted from the pressures and everything placed upon you. Find pleasure and enjoyment in your work. Your work is your purpose. You are here with a purpose. Life is good, and it only gets better. Any flaws, any bumps in the road, flaws just remind us that love heals.
Lead with love. You are a powerful leader. Lead with love. Love for yourself, love for your work, love for what you do, love for others, love for your, love for everyone and anything. Just lead with love.
Feel your own unconditional love and just be in bliss right here, right now.
This clarity, this bliss is going to guide you, guide you into giving unconditionally, to accepting, accepting the loss of what was so that you can have faith. In the abundance and the flow that is now open to you, you are opening that pathway for abundance to flow to you. It doesn't matter where you've been, where you've come from, what mistakes you've made, what you have or haven't done.
Love yourself where you're at right now, love yourself for the lessons you have learned. Love is absolute, it is infinite. There is more than enough abundance in the universe and it is there for you too. There is more than enough love out there, but you need to love yourself. And if you don't, you have to find out where that block is because the more you pour into yourself, make time to show yourself love.
If you don't know how to love yourself yet, make that a priority. Personal growth. Pour into your own cup first. It's okay to love yourself first because pouring from an empty glass isn't going to fucking help anybody. You just feel empty. So take action, act on your bliss. Lean more into bliss. Lean more into love.
Feel the love from the universe. Feel it in your being
so that abundance can flow more easily to you now. This is your divine order. This is how you call in more that is aligned with you and your purpose. Feel this heart chakra, your heart beating in your chest. Be present. Sit with this for a moment as you bask in the gratitude of your life is Precious and how thankful you are to be here to be living this journey No matter what you show up.
No matter what. I love you. I'm so grateful to have you here with me today I'd love to hear what comes up for you in these activations. I'd love to hear you celebrate doing these activations Take a picture, film some b roll, use it for your content, share with the world how you're taking care of yourself and how you're leading with love.
And celebrate each small step and small action, just like participating in this podcast, listening. Take action to share this with a loved one, with a friend who might benefit. Share with a business bestie who might be struggling and feeling alone and lack herself, but is too scared to tell you. Share with the world so that we can co create this amazing, beautiful, blissful existence as we build the most beautiful lives for ourselves, grow our businesses to make more of an impact and build more beautiful lives and more beautiful experiences for all those that we work with and heal together.
Until next time.
